well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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