There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
