Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
You need a sexual gate keeper
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
