I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
