Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(631): View more from New York

You only like me because I'm a challenge

(201): View more from New Jersey

You already blew me

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(631): You only like me because I'm a challenge (201): You already blew me http://tfl.nu/s47q

Replies (21) Good night (6097) Bad night (1229)
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(701): View more from North Dakota

I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.

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(701): I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships. http://tfl.nu/filq

Replies (12) Good night (3840) Bad night (1150)
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(309): View more from Illinois

I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.

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(309): I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights. http://tfl.nu/c1hf

Replies (5) Good night (1572) Bad night (1226)
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(443): View more from Maryland

The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.

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(443): The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook. http://tfl.nu/hkf6

Replies (6) Good night (1510) Bad night (919)
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(734): View more from Michigan

It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."

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(734): It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE." http://tfl.nu/k46u

Replies (8) Good night (670) Bad night (1718)
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(248): View more from Michigan

In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!

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(248): In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list! http://tfl.nu/ms7h

Replies (20) Good night (1274) Bad night (495)
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(310): View more from California

I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.

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(310): I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated. http://tfl.nu/zxsm

Replies (6) Good night (1794) Bad night (438)
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(407): View more from Florida

I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.

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(407): I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter. http://tfl.nu/mj4q

Replies (2) Good night (639) Bad night (308)
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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.

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(832): I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass. http://tfl.nu/h3v0

Replies (13) Good night (869) Bad night (275)
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(303): View more from Colorado

No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.

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(303): No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities. http://tfl.nu/n27f

Replies (1) Good night (602) Bad night (258)
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(775): View more from Nevada

Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.

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(775): Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers. http://tfl.nu/u3nj

Replies (3) Good night (548) Bad night (250)
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(614): View more from Ohio

So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?

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(614): So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes? http://tfl.nu/y2f0

Replies (8) Good night (885) Bad night (287)
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(619): View more from California

I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.

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(619): I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers. http://tfl.nu/goy8

Replies (3) Good night (627) Bad night (238)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?

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(610): How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too? http://tfl.nu/27f3

Replies (2) Good night (191) Bad night (408)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.

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(405): Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk. http://tfl.nu/nrcu

Replies (0) Good night (335) Bad night (157)

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