Texts From Last Night

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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers

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  (920): Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers http://tfl.nu/3qjt
  Replies (22) Good night (960) Bad night (561)
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  (760): View more from California

  O no, u 2 are dating again?

  (503): View more from Oregon

  No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture

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  (760): O no, u 2 are dating again? (503): No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture http://tfl.nu/e7yu
  Replies (7) Good night (951) Bad night (2214)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet

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  (918): eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet http://tfl.nu/8959
  Replies (7) Good night (552) Bad night (4014)
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  (845): View more from New York

  I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.

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  (845): I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt. http://tfl.nu/j6pk
  Replies (9) Good night (635) Bad night (2502)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.

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  (612): all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high. http://tfl.nu/s4fq
  Replies (33) Good night (6315) Bad night (864)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.

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  (503): if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up. http://tfl.nu/w9vg
  Replies (26) Good night (1209) Bad night (6647)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home." 

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  (708): I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."  http://tfl.nu/9eb3
  Replies (15) Good night (7236) Bad night (1176)
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  (252): View more from North Carolina

  its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get

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  (252): its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get http://tfl.nu/sb3f
  Replies (18) Good night (1252) Bad night (3993)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.

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  (719): No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor. http://tfl.nu/gx10
  Replies (7) Good night (1004) Bad night (6454)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.

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  (913): My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one. http://tfl.nu/ad80
  Replies (9) Good night (1129) Bad night (971)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...

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  (801): He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"... http://tfl.nu/bw0v
  Replies (4) Good night (429) Bad night (921)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.

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  (480): I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole. http://tfl.nu/g5bi
  Replies (7) Good night (371) Bad night (1339)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.

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  (269): They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth. http://tfl.nu/6jfd
  Replies (10) Good night (396) Bad night (1378)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.

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  (484): So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest. http://tfl.nu/3leh
  Replies (0) Good night (489) Bad night (228)
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  (562): View more from California

  We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.

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  (562): We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt. http://tfl.nu/27nr
  Replies (2) Good night (514) Bad night (219)

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