is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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