I think I am morally bankrupt
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
