I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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