it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
