So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
