definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
