doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
