would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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