He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
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he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
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It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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