great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
It's rum buckets o'clock
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize