I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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