Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
