My room smells like vodka and shame
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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