what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
