and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
