Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
