Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
