I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
