so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
