'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
this boner is exhausting
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
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