i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
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They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
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so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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