i just google imaged poop.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
