I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
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