just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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