I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize