Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
You've changed since you got that strap on
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize