so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Randomize
