super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
they need to just BURY HIM!
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
