And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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