it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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