the day after is always just damage control
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
