remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
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