Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
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