So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
