She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize