taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
The power of my boobs compel you
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
