I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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