I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
