Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
