Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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