South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize