i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
why does every cop we meet know your name?
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
