i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize