PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
