Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
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