We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize