well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
